Having friends of the opposite sex when married continues to be a debate among couples and most experts will tell you that this can be a source of huge conflicts. However, many men still maintain friendships with women, and if you're one of the lucky ones with a wife willing to acknowledge this, you still have to be aware of some things.
Just because your wife isn't raising hell about your platonic female friendships doesn't mean she's comfortable with it. If you have female friends and would like to keep your marriage intact, here are five rules you need to follow:
1) Set some personal boundaries.
Choose the times, places and instances you spend with your female friends carefully, including online. Do you really need to send texts to your friend all the time? The biggest problem with having a friend of the opposite sex is the possibility of flirtation. Even rock solid marriages are not entirely secure as relationships can go through a difficult period. When that happens, a female best friend's emotional support and assuring gestures can unintentionally turn into something else, according to Art Of Manliness. Why open yourself up to the temptation?
2) Discuss issues only with our wife.
How you discipline the kids or how you budget your money are things that couples talk about with each other - not with their best friends - even if that best friend can provide good advice from a female person's point of view. If your female friend is privy to your marital woes, you're essentially inviting her as the third person in the marriage. And if you want a woman's point of view, remember: Your wife is a woman, too.
3) No double standards.
If you have female friends in your life, does your wife have platonic friends among the opposite sex as well? Are you okay with this, too? You can't insist on her not having male friends, if she's understanding of your friendships with other women. Try to understand what this friendship is about too, before jumping to any conclusions.
4) Don't hide anything from your wife.
"Never lie about the time you spend with your friend," said life coach Jessica Sabatini via CNN. If you're not comfortable about informing your significant other this, there might be something to worry about. There are lies and there are lies of omission. Don't make it look like you have something to hide.
5) Spend time as a group.
Let your wife get to know your female friend better. Including your wife in the friendship offers transparency and will make things more comfortable for everyone, according to Pop Sugar. As much as possible, acknowledge your wife's value around your female friends, too.
