Breakups suck.
It can even be tough to listen to a friend go on and on and on about the end of a relationship, but a new study suggests that reflecting on a breakup speeds up emotional rebound, according to PsyPost.
"Breakups are ubiquitous - most adults have experienced at least one in their life - and are typically very distressing," Grace Larson of Northwestern University told PsyPost. Larson and her then-adviser David Sbarra of the University of Arizona studied divorce and breakups for years and started to wonder if their studies' methods were harmful to the participants.
"At first glance, it might seem like repeatedly reminding participants that they had just broken up - and asking them to describe the breakup over and over - might delay recovery," Larson told PsyPost.
The researchers discovered that the opposite was true.
The study, published in Social Psychological and Personality Science, found that through "self-concept reorganization," participating in the study helped subjects "build a stronger sense of who they were as single people," Larson said.
"The process of becoming psychologically intertwined with the partner is painful to have to undo," Larson told PsyPost. "Our study provides additional evidence that self-concept repair actually causes improvements in well-being ... it might be simply the effect of repeatedly reflecting on one's experience and crafting a narrative - especially a narrative that includes the part of the story where one recovers."
"The recovery of a clear and independent self-concept seems to be a big force driving the positive effects of this study, so I would encourage a person who recently experienced a breakup to consider who he or she is, apart from the relationship," Larson said. "If that person can reflect on the aspects of him- or herself that he or she may have neglected during the relationship but can now nurture once again, this might be particularly helpful."
