I know, I know; I'm a day late with the "Game of Thrones" recap. But much like Robert Baratheon, I gorged myself on food and wine this weekend while on vacation and did not arrive home from a cross-country flight until two in the morning today. And while Sunday's episode used nudity to help tell a story, last night's flight saw a very obese woman use it to breastfeed her screaming infant right next to me. I now know the very valuable lesson that not all nudity is enjoyable. *Shudders in discomfort*
But I digress. I thought that Sunday's episode "The Gift" would center on Arya and the House of Black and White providing the gift of death to its patrons (Hey bartender, another round of poison spiked water on me!) but how very wrong I was. Instead, the Gift was a living, breathing soul that could potentially become a major asset for a power player.
Shall we dive in?
The Wall
Ollie, Jon's steward, is straight mean mugging his Lord Commander as he prepares to go North with Tormund to bring the Wildlings back. The camera lingers on Ollie's dissatisfaction almost a bit too long...
Ser Alliser Thorne is also displeased with his boss' strategy. Is Jon right to keep the big picture in mind with Winter and the White Walkers coming or are the men of the Night's Watch justified in their disgust with this plan? Probably a little bit of both. Either way, the dissension among the ranks is palpable and it's clear that King's Landing is not the only place where politics are at play.
Sam gives Jon a dragonglass blade (second time this material has been mentioned recently) and a hug goodbye. Is it me, or did there seem to be a bit of finality to that hug? This trip beyond The Wall doesn't happen in the books so your guess is as good as mine as to what is about to happen.
I know Maester Aemon is supposed to be, like, 100 years old, but it was still sad to see him die. Imagine how much better off the realm would have been had he stayed in the Royal family. And imagine how much better things would remain at Castle Black. "You're losing all your friends, Tarly," Thorne scowls at Maester Aemon's funeral.
(Side Note: Is it important to note that Aemon repeatedly talked about Egg AKA Aegon The Unlikely before dying? Egg is Aemon's brother and Werys is his nephew.)
To hit that particular nail over the head, two Watchmen try to rape Gilly later in the episode and dole out a vicious beating to Sam. But then something interesting happen; Sam gets up. This guy just took eight or nine brutal blows to the face and he stands up with a clear head and danger in his eyes. "I killed a White Walker, I killed a Thenn. I think I'll take my chances with you," Sam tells the would-be attackers. And just then, Jon's Direwolf Ghost comes in, snarling as the Watchmen tear off in fear.
Did Sam just Warg into Ghost? His sudden resurgence from that fight and then his almost immediate collapse after it was over was suspicious. It really felt like he drew power from Ghost and summoned him. That would be an interesting twist.
Oh, and Sam also gets to swipe his V-Card with Gilly. My man (Westerosi Fist Bump).
Winterfell
Sansa has been locked in her room for weeks, receiving brutal nightly visits from Ramsay. She begs Theon for his help and tries to put him on the path of redemption and re-discovery of his identity. "You are Theon Greyjoy, last living son of Balon Greyjoy, Lord of the Iron Islands," she tells him.
We see the bruises and the tears; Sansa has been beaten in more ways than one. But her rallying cry for Theon reveals that she isn't yet broken. She makes him agree to light a candle in the Tower, signifying Sansa's friends in the North AKA Brienne. And, just for a moment, the audience is tempted to believe that a small piece of Theon still exists, that he isn't completely Reek, and that he will help her.
But that moment is short lived as Theon immediately reveals this plan to Ramsay. What a gut-wrenching move.
Sansa plays the next scene as well as she can, trying to create division in the Bolton ranks by prodding Ramsay about his soon-to-be new sibling's place in the Bolton will. But Ramsay has the trump card: the flayed body of Sansa's helpful handmaiden.
Despite her best efforts, Sansa is still helpless. She can't adapt to her situation like Dany did with Khal Drogo, she doesn't have inherent power like Cersei and she can't maneuver like Margaery. At this point, the showrunners should either push her into a power position where she finally starts making her own moves and hatching her own successful plans or they should just end her suffering by killing her off. I'm serious; watching an innocent girl be tortured for five years has lost all of its function as a storytelling device. Enough is enough.
North
A storm is wreaking havoc on Stannis' forces as they march toward Winterfell. Resources are dwindling and sellswords are abandoning ship. Ser Davos advises patience, "this isn't our time," he counsels. But Stannis knows that Winter is coming and if they turn back now they'll be stuck for years in one place. His steadfast determination will not be broken. "We march to victory or we march to defeat. But we go forward. Only forward." Both men are right for different reasons.
That reminds me, we haven't gotten a creepy Melisandre scene in a while. Just as Stannis goes to unsheathe his longsword with her, the Red Priestess opts for a different tactic. No lovechild smokebaby this time. Melisandre wants to sacrifice Princess Shireen for the cause because she has King's Blood, but Stannis is having none of it and tell her to get lost.
Here is the crux of leadership we've seen from every major player in the series. What are you willing to do to win? How much of yourself are you willing to compromise when leading? Tywin Lannister was a man of no morals who conducted unspeakable atrocities to gain power. Ned Stark was stubbornly honorably to a fault. Robb Stark sacrificed his honor for love and then did the "right thing" when executing disobedient Lords which irreparably hurt his cause. Dany is struggling to find a quality balance between justice and ruthlessness.
Is Stannis willing to lose all that he stands for - justice, loyalty, tradition - to satisfy his need for power?
Dorne
Out of everyone in this entire show, it is somehow Mrycella Baratheon who is the most rational person. She accepted her fate and did her duty as a Princess by going off to Dorne as a young child. Now that she has been there for years, she has fallen in love with Trystane Martell and is happy to marry him in the near future. "You don't know me," she tells Jaime as he fumbles to explain his reasons for being there. This mission is going just swimmingly for him.
Meanwhile, Bronn is literally singing in jail. Is he not the coolest guy in the entire Seven Kingdoms? He needs his own action comedy spin-off show: think "Spartacus" mixed with "How I Met Your Mother."
One of the Sand Snakes is clearly a bit smitten with him, "he has a good voice," but not before revealing that he has been poisoned and is slowly dying. If you remember last week, he was cut by a spear during his fight with the Sand Snakes. Being Oberyn's daughters, they dip their weapons in poison because being deadly is kind of their thing. Bronn's death would be pretty meaningless in the grand scheme of things, though, and would rob the show of its remaining levity.
Fortunately, she gives Bronn the antidote in what can only be described as the oddest come on in the history of sexuality.
King's Landing
No television show does two-people-talking-alone better than "Game of Thrones."
Lady Olenna goes to speak with the High Sparrow, but she is dealing with a force she has never really encountered before. This is a man who cannot be bought with gold or bribed with power. This is man who cannot be reasoned with or pushed to compromise through intimidation. This is a man who is fully and completely devoted to one course of action and is following a radically different ideology than her own.
"A lifetime of wealth and power has left you blind in one eye," the High Sparrow tells her. He speaks of the humble citizens of Westeros who have no power or wealth; the masses versus the one percenters. "When the many stop fearing the few..." he leaves the rest of the threat unsaid. This is the definition of Shots Fired.
Later, Littlefinger and Lady Olenna (seriously, can we replace Hillary with the Queen of Thorns for the 2016 elections?) meet at one of Lord Baelish's, ahem, less than reputable establishments. "You've always been rather impressed with yourself," Lady Olenna says, accurately summing up Littlefinger's seasons of smugness in seven words. The two discuss their mutual contributions to Joffery's murder and she points out that their fates are intertwined; their allegiance is one of necessity. The Tyrells + The Vale is quite formidable.
Littlefigner says he has brought something to the table, something Cersei does not know about, in the form of a "handsome young man." I think he's talking about Lancel Lannister right here. Littlefinger knows Cersei cheated on Robert with Lancel and everyone knows they are cousins. That, along with the rumors of twincest, are enough for the Faith to turn on Cersei. It's possible (probable) that Littlefinger greased the wheels on that one.
Cersei then goes to visit Margaery who is being held captive by the Sparrows. But Margaery is no fool. "I know you did this. Lies come easily to you, everyone knows that. But innocence, decency, concern...you're not very good at those." Cersei smirks at her handiwork which makes this long anticipated next move oh so enjoyable.
The Faith represents anti-corruption and Cersei Lannister is ten steps above Richard Nixon in that department. And Lancel Lannister knows it. He spills the beans to the High Sparrow. "What will we find when we strip away your finery?" the religious leader asks as he arrests Cersei and tosses her in a cell.
Cersei was incredibly short sided when she armed the Faith and now she's paying the price for it. They were always going to come for her, it was just a matter of time.
Slaver's Bay
Jorah is bought in a slave auction thanks to his long list of accomplishments in battle. Tyrion quickly talks himself into purchase as well by beating the crap out of one of his jailers. It is, quite frankly, an awesome scene. #TeamTyrion
In Mereen, it is customary for the rulers to view the warm up matches before the Fighting Pits. It just so happens that Tyrion and Jorah are at these matches with Daenerys just a few feet away. Seeing his beloved Khaleesi sickened by the violence and preparing to leave, Jorah springs into action in one of the finest scenes of ass-kicking we have seen.
Hidden under a helmet, Jorah beats every single combatant on the field without killing them, showing Daenerys the combination of strength and mercy she is looking for in this world. He is fueled by love and devotion and it is an impressive display. But she commands that he be taken out of her sight when he removes his helm victorious. The Friend Zone struggle is real, my man.
Before he can be taken away, though, Jorah reveals that he has brought Daenerys a gift. And just like that, Tyrion Lannister strolls out to introduce himself.
It took just seven episodes for "Game of Thrones" to do what George R.R. Martin couldn't in more than 1,000 pages. Tyrion is Jorah's gift to Dany. This will change the entire dynamic of both the show and the power struggle within it. He can be both a bargaining chip (remember, King's Landing still wants him for the "murder" of Joffery), or hopefully an asset who becomes one of Dany's aides. Either way, I am really excited to see how this plays out.
Random Thoughts
-This was easily the best episode of the entire season. Finally, actions of real consequence took place. Cersei was jailed and will finally face judgment for her many misdeeds. Tyrion, Jorah and Dany finally met up which could be a game-changer of epic proportions. Big things are starting to happen instead of the slow and non-crucial developments of the first half of the lackluster season.
-Everything seems to be circling the preparation of change to come. Jon is facing a new dawn with Winter coming and there is conflict within Castle Black. Sansa's story has to be heading one way or the other: to tragedy or triumph. Ditto for Theon. This episode felt like a tilt-a-whirl spinning around the base of uncertainty. Sooner or later, it has to land somewhere.
-Seriously, where is Varys? Has he just given up trying to help the realm? You'd think he'd send a raven or two out scouring Essos for Tyrion.
-"The Gift" has a positive connotation. It really makes me believe that Tyrion and Dany will somehow forge an actual bond that goes beyond sharing a common enemy. That would help lift Tyrion's story above just trying to stay alive.
-The only time Cersei is ever genuine is when it comes to her kids. She truly means it when she says she would burn cities to the ground to protect them. While that is redeeming, she still lets her ego and cruelty put them in terrible positions in the long-term.
