Breakups hurt no matter if it was mutual or one-sided, but losing someone that wasn't right for you in the first place is a gain, not a loss. Take a look at the positive reasons for why a breakup can actually be a positive thing.
1. You get to quit explaining to your friends that he actually had some benefits. Excuses be gone, and some of the stuff he did, said or made you feel was real and inappropriate. Making excuses for his behavior just tells your friends that you accepted the poor way he sometimes treated you.
2. Finally a great night sleep! Sometimes we get used to sleeping with someone, and the loss of the additional body in bed can make it hard to adjust, but how good was your sleep in the relationship? Were you always cold because he likes the windows open or prefers all of the covers off of them? Did he snore like a freight train and wake you up every time he rolled over again? Sometimes he never gets our need for tons of luxurious pillows and blankets, according to the Cosmopolitan. Well, the bed is all yours now - the whole bed, pillows and all.
3. Now is the time to go out with that hot guy you have had a secret crush on. Now is the time for new things - new first kisses, new dates, new getting to know someone that is anything but your ex. And while you are at it, join that new online dating site your single friends are on. Nothing puts a smile back on your face like a great new guy who has all of the right things to say as he lavishes attention on you.
4. Chocolate for breakfast, yes indeed, or anytime for that matter. If you are having trouble sleeping due to a big nap when you came home from work, you can now pop in the best chick flick (you get to pick the movies now) and eat a bowl of fruit loops at 3 a.m. if you want.
5. You are finally available and open to a new relationship that is right for you, according to She Knows. Learning from the past mistakes, you get to go into a relationship clear-headed and more defined the next time to your wants and needs. Compromise on small things, but the bones of the relationship should be mutually desired.
"After the initial upset, review the dynamics of the relationship and analyze what went wrong, what you could have done differently and what you learned," suggests Tina B. Tessina, Ph.D., a psychotherapist known as "Dr. Romance." "You'll get information from this experience that will help make the next relationship successful and happy."
Once you get past the idea of going from a "we" to a "you," you can see the positive benefits occurring, says All Women Stalk. If a relationship is your goal, it still needs to be the right one. Mr. Right Now only gets in the way and hinders you from finding Mr. Right. Let the breakup strength you, not define or destroy who you are.
