We love to communicate, and deep down we feel it would be divine if our guy had the same affinity to chatting like we do, but there is no such luck for many relationships. Why the communication gap and why we take it so negatively is one of life's mysteries. We know the whole Mars vs. Venus concept, so we shouldn't be surprised that our man to be so closed off with communication.
"Men are socialized that revealing their feelings and struggles can look like weakness," says Brandy Engler, Ph.D., a relationship expert, according to Brides. "When we say to our husbands 'let's talk,' it's often code for 'let me tell you what's wrong with our relationship or what expectations I have.'"
No wonder guys flee from that conversation. Looking at it from their level should give better insight. We have hit up the experts to find the best tips to get your man to open up. Just like snowflakes, no two men are the same, so you might need to try a few tricks before he tells you what's on his mind.
Positive body language opens you up to show him you are interested in what he has to say, according to psychotherapist Jonathan Alpert, author of "Be Fearless: Change Your Life in 28 Days." Uncross your arms, lean forward and adopt a friendly posture to welcome the flow of conversation.
Try "mirroring" - making reflective comments in agreement with what he is saying. "They show that you hear what he is going through," Engler says.
Open-ended questions help engage your guy and force him gently to answer with something more than a yes or no response.
Positive attention is instant feedback that encourages them to continue. Engler advises to touch his arm, make eye contact and nod your head, all positive, engaging non-verbal cues that show your interest in what he has to say will turn this conversation "chore" into an intimate moment between the two of you.
No one likes being forced into a conversation or feel they are being controlled, according to Mind Body Green. Even if it is small for us, it may be a big thing to him. Getting him inspired to open up and connect will be simple, once we quit trying to change our guy. Remember we see the world differently than they do. To get the communication to flow may require us being a little sneaky in your methods, but the end result should bring you closer.
